February 20,2014

Yesterday, writing for me was then that easy..

Expressing every single ideas in my mind was not that hard and long enough to evoke..

My mind is always busted with ideas…..

I think so much.. that’s why my imagination goes that far…

I dreamed of everything that the story I have in mind needs…

I cry ..when i think of a sad story..

I laugh..when I used to do humor..

I pity ..when I want a weak character..
I soar high..when i want fantasy…
I believe in magic…when I was carried with different world..

and.. I become in love..

when i choose to feel it..

not with the true person..

but with the fruits of my art…

That’s what I am before…

Not until I’ve met this person..

He’s not that someone whom used to ask for a dance with me over and over again just to get to know me..
He’s not that guy who’ll irritate me just for him to be noticed…..
He’s not that guy who’ll kissed my hand for the first time,,
He’s not that guy who’ll be a bad guy to everyone and then made me feel the most special girl for her..

He’s not that guy who’ll always entertain every single text and call that I do..

He’s not that guy who’ll show everyone that he likes me..
He’s not that guy that will be at my side with just a text away or even go with me in a hang out..

He’s not that guy that will pick me up and have stroll just to see the great sceneries…

He’s not that guy that will directly answer everyone and proudly tells that he likes me.
He’s not that guy that will make ways just to see me  even for only an hour and despite having no sleep at all.

He’s not the guy that will tell me stories about his life.

He ‘s not the guy who’ll make a portrait of me and will leave surprises on my birthday..

He’s not the guy that will bring my bag when he sees me..

He’s not the guy that will walk with me until I got home.

He’s not that guy who’ll sit beside me while looking at the full moon…

He’s not the guy  who’ll join me attend a concert..

He’s not the guy that will always say how much he loves me…

But still..

He’s not the guy that I will use to ignore…

He’s that irresistable…

He’s not that guy I look for..

Because he’s that kind of guy whom used not to express himself, a selfish one who only loves silence.

A man whom you can’t figured out.

He’s simply that man you never expects to have a good and sincere heart,,,

He’s the man who’ll patiently wait for you until you’ve slept even if he stays outside his place and been sucked with mosquitoes for so long.

He’s the man who’ll you expect to send you unexpected and sincere messages that’s not his usual thing

He’s the man who’ll insist to know your family and bring you to their home to meet his family rather than meet his friends.

He’s the man who’ll be thoughtful enough to prepare food for you.

He’s the man who will give your favorite flower without asking for it.

He’s the man whom be that vulnerable with you.

He’s the man, who’ll be in teary eye when getting jealous.

He’s the man who’ll not hesitate to know everything about you.

He’s the man who’ll call you many times just to know you are safe.

He’s the man who’ll do chores for you even if you are the woman.

He’s the man that will always believe you even if you are fooling around.

rather He’s that guy everyone is looking for..
A person who have his own way of showing his love. In a way that’s everlasting…

A sincere person I used to love truly…

and forever will own my heart…

The Greatest Gift God gave me is him.
He’s not just  my boyfriend ..

but much of a Partner…:)

Bottled

It’s like a nightmare that keeps haunting

A feeling when you can’t help but stay still

Because no matter what you think you can

There isn’t any way you could solve it

Time fleets

And every second you’ll lose a piece of you

How ? How could you escape..

No.

Rather how could you resolve it?

Pressure. Yes it is.

Just sleep.

And face tomorrow.

For every sunset is a time of reset.

Painful it is not to control things….

And yet you have to let yourself feel the pain

Just remember this too shall pass.

Maybe not now but soon…

Someday …somewhere..

As long as you’ll see another sunset..:

Hope will stay…

Walk away

There come times

When all else falls

Not because we wanted to

But it just happened

Those days when you feel you wanted to escape

A reality you wished not to see

And yet you have to face

No matter how hard

No matter how much it hurts

That’s what you called living

Pain is part of it

Not because we’re contented

We are always happy

Sometimes you still wanted to be in different place

Different time

Different situation

And yet all you can do is

Stay still

Because sometimes

The more you wanted to walk away

The more you can’t do anything

It will always be all in the mind

Yet someday somehow

You’ll figure out

If running is the same as escape

And escape is same as being afraid

Yet no one can judge

For no one can understand

Hopefully someday somewhere

We’ll all lead to the answer

That everyone wanted to walk away…

The beauty inside.

It was exactly 8 days since we  are forced to shut our doors from busy city of Manila. It was a luck that despite no public transportation that time – the day of “Total Lockdown” was implemented in Luzon area, we still managed to go home. We are few of those lucky individuals whom able to grab private car to get us home.

Honestly, what I’ve felt for now is to wish my life will always be like this. That  feeling  of waking up at your own bed and inhaling fresh air while hearing the birds chirping and leaves rustling. The calmness that the home brings gives joy to like me who only stays for a short time while in the province.

Days for me became busy. Unlike everyone, I felt time is running. Time is fleeting.  Why? Maybe because … I do a lot of things even in this time.

The moment I arrive home late in the afternoon last Tuesday March 17 was the only time I managed to relax a bit and watch kdrama. Yes, that was the last time so far that I managed to sit comfortably in sofa and watched the series. The day after that became a routine for me.

I am not a morning person maybe due to my schedule in office. My alarm rings at exactly 7:30 am. I woke up sometimes earlier than that! Promise! Waking up in the morning alone in our home was the routine. My parents already went out for their work. Work I mean, my father used to leave our house as early as 3am in the morning to manage the Meat shop. My mother then wakes up early to clean the surroundings and feed the animals.  I am the housekeeper when they are not home. I usually take a bath before my day starts. (Hygiene matters!)  Afterwards, I will clean a little (if not too late) and cook my breakfast. My parents do not usually cook for me anymore. But they cook at times usually lunch and dinner.  I then put my laptop in my work area  and sip coffee as I open my files.

What do I do then?  I’m doing a research. Yes, academic research for my schooling. Also at times I have to answer quizzes and exams. I read lessons because we are now in distant learning. The school managed to implement learning management system after Taal Volcano eruption hence our schooling did not stop.  By the way, I do Mylearning also. 🙂 Work & Training comes first! 🙂

It seemed boring but I make sure to stay away from my laptop whenever I felt my eyes being tired. I make sure I have time to spare to walk around our house, walk our dog, check our only fish :), clean the stuff my father wanted me to clean, eat fresh fruits and veggies, check my plants, cook merienda, go for grocery (I do once!:)), listen to songs (I played Christian songs everyday and watched Sunday mass online) , and take care of my parents.

Before I went home last week, I always say “Power of Positivity”.  I think this adds up to my emotion why I don’t feel any thought of being locked in Manila for a month. I always think that time, that I could go home despite the news around the city of having no public transportation at all. I now realize why I felt that way, because God wanted me to see the beauty inside. The beauty inside a home. God gave me a chance to see His beautiful creations and a chance to be a daughter. Taking care of my loved ones and seeing them grow makes me convinced that I do not have to waste time to be sad, angry, worried and fearful. Everyday is chance. A chance to be better than yesterday.  What happens today is no accident. It has a purpose. We might not know now but at God’s time it will be revealed. We only have to be patient. 🙂 It doesn’t kill you only if you don’t trust.

So for those of you who feel down at this moment, take time to pray and trust Him! All shall pass soon. One day, we will all smile and realize that we are stronger than any virus because we have a God that will never leave us no matter what.

Stay positive guys! P.S. tomorrow I will start to add in my routine the 10 minute exercise. :):):)

 

 

 

 

 

What it feels like working on a holiday?

While most people are enjoying their time off with their loved ones, few are working hard to ensure that business is still going.

It sounds sad?

Yes.

But not really.

A holiday is one of the peaceful days….. of the road.

Peace. Silence. Tranquility.

It’s a time to say “God created another beautiful day.”

It’s tiring but worth your while.

Simply because.. Happiness is a choice. Every moment is a chance to be productive. Every moment is a chance to be better each day.

Oh, don’t forget you’ll take home more than what you are being paid for. 😉

Happy holidays!

🙄

Sitting still and wishing makes no person great.

The good Lord sends the fishing but you dig the bait.

-John Masefield

Oh Monday!

Monday….seems maunday

As i gaze at the 🕒 clock..

Oh my! It ‘s time to wake up!

But my mind…

My heart..

And my soul says…

Sleep sleep sleep…😁

The start of the week

Seems the tiring day to get up from bed..

Though as you ponder…

Mondays are like opportunities we missed….

We are afraid to get off our comfort zone. We are afraid to start changes.

We are simply lazy at times. 😁

But…

Never forget brave souls were once weak from the outside.

Happy productive monday! 😁

A Crisscross journey – TAAL VOLCANO ADVENTURE

It was a gloomy weather. Clouds embraced the sun as we traverse down to the side of the lake. Soft, cold and slightly humid breezes from every waves of water of the lake. And yes, finally we are one eye closer to our destination-the island inside an island- Taal volcano.

We woke up early in the morning to have our day trip to Taal volcano. From Buendia, we rode a bus going to Tanauan City. We chose this route for it is more convenient rather than going to Tagaytay and down to the lake. Another route would be riding a bus going to Lemery and getting off to Taal, Batangas itself. But we opted the other side of the journey which is  travelling to Talisay Batangas.

At almost 8am, The ride was then smooth after the slight traffic in the SLEX, it was not long enough when we stepped our foot in Tanauan batangas. From there, we walked towards city’s public market and rode  a jeep going to Talisay. We were transferred to a jeepney stop and from there our short ride begins. It was only 10-20 minutes ride and we get off at the heart of Talisay Batangas.

We had our first meal at a small carinderia. Of course, we don’t expect much from the food. The taste was just typical. Then after,we decided to continue our journey. We rent a roundtrip boat ride costing Php1,500. We opted to have a guide for Php 500  for us to be safe in the hiking. The boat ride wasn’t that short as we expected. It took couples of minutes to get on the island. The lake was  little calm but its wave made our face wet. We had to cover our faces and secure our belongings. Finally we step our foot at the Taal volcano itself. The island you saw when you are in the Tagaytay. Impression- it was a community! There were houses, habitants, open basketball court, elementary school and so many little horses!. Yes , little, not the typical horse you’ll see in a race rather the minute one. It was true that the people there would sell you anything at higher price but since we don’t seem to be a foreigner, they did not been so “makulet” to us. We have two guide, a lady teen and her father.

We chose not to ride a horse for it is another Php 500 for each one of us and also we would want the trip to be slow so as we could have more selfies. The first part of the hike was a bit challenge to me. It was my very first hiking moment and I feel so tired for every step that I made. My colleagues were a bit faster than me but the other guide(the older one) chose to be patient with me. I was lucky!

I could hear my breaths as I climbed. Actually the beginning was stiff and we have to be alert for every horses and tourists in front and behind us.  We had our first stopover, Thanks to me for I sweated that much easily. We noticed that there were wood crosses beside the road. The guide told us that these  crosses were used last Holy week for the pilgrims. The scenery as we go on was magical. The wind caresses our body with its coldness and current. We have a clear view of places that surrounds the lake. It look like a typical mountain scenery. But the difference lies when we smell that musty smell- sulfur! We started to feel the warmth of volcanic gases emitting from holes in the road we step on. We saw the trails of lava that flew from the volcano and the rock formation due to cold lava. With this, it was a bit scary to think that we are on a live volcano that could explode anytime! But then we need to have precaution not to slip away due to the coming horses  aside from thinking that fact.

In every stops that we make, we find time to feel the air and have good shots. We use to count the crosses so that we could assess if we are near or not. After 2 hours of walking , we finally end up at the top of the volcano. Yes at the top, and we saw another lake beneath us. The guide told us that to get there, we need to start at the other side of the lake. He also told us that the other side is much costly and more stiff that the one we walked on but the good thing is we can go down the lake inside the volcano. It was  a good idea to repeat the trip huh! But that’s more risky I guess. From the top , there were build it platform and elevated floors to let tourist take their selfies. There are were also food and drinks being sold.

The price is twice or thrice higher but the effort of bringing it on top of the volcano somehow justify it. Looking the whole place from above was very relaxing. You would wish not to go down and stay there!

On other hand, what’s in the lake inside the island? By zooming the camera, you will see that the water was literally hot- it is boiling! Weird, because we saw a rubber boat sailing on it. Don’t know whom or why it was there. Sadly it was not captured by my camera. Also to get a more good shots, There is this lava thing that have 50 php entrance fee. You just have to climb again to it but I just chose to took the photograph of it instead of climbing again.

We rested for a while and decided to buy halo halo. I can say that it was at its fair price because it was delicious. Eating halo halo inside a volcano sounds rare, right? J

After taking all the selfies in the world , we managed to go down. The trek was even faster and good. It was not hard for me to go down. The only struggle we have was to cross with that the bunch of tourists and horses . There were sometimes traffic of horses- hehe.

It took an hour only for us to go down. As we came near to the shoreline, we saw how simple the life of the settlers inside the volcano. Their means of living were the tourism, fishing and agriculture. Children have to ride a boat to get their secondary education. I doubt that  people  usually goes to nearby province to buy goods. My heart joyed as I saw smiles in face of  a child whom suddenly greeted us warmly. Her innocence could speak their life in the island. They do have electricity but it was through generator only. I supposed that only few would manage to have electricity day and night given that scenario.

The sun is still up when we get in the boat and leave the island. It was  a  more or less 4 hours journey. It has been my dream to go there. I was not disappointed though. 🙂

Not stiffy trek above

Wooden Cross

Perfect for Couple photo!

The Trek

The Lake inside the Lake!

Horses!

It is really boiling!

Halo Halo Time!

Traffic of Horses XD

The other image of volcano.

Live Volcano! Emitting sulfur

A community!

Boat sailing going to Volcano Island.

taken for granted

Many times do I try to understand you.

Many times do I forgive you.

I tried not to expect.

I tried so hard to forget.

I simply tried to be numb.

I’m hurt.

I’m hurt every time.

Every time you feel confident.

Confident in the sense of not losing me.

Maybe because you always think.

All were okay.

Everything was just about me.

It was only me who makes thing complicated.

But ….am i truly  wrong?

Is it wrong to get mad when you did not tell you’re whereabouts?

Is it bad to feel worried every time I do not have any idea how you’re going?

Am I making myself be prioritized by asking to spend some time to meet me?

Can’t I understand that you’re busy?

Can’t I expect for you to do favor for me after the wrong you’ve done?

Am I that easy to be taken for granted everytime…

A simple reply, a simple talk makes my heart calm…

But then, for how long?

For how long someone plays too innocent…

Innocent enough not to notice someone’s suffering.

Why do people are like that?

and why do we can’t just leave people like that?

 

“It will always be too hard to take a step, but once it has been done, reasons to let go will make you move forward”

Keep moving! Keep fighting!

 

 

Rooted eye Series: The end of a beginning

Please allow me to write short stories depicting fictional characters. I do love science and fictions. I do love adventure and thrilling stories… This story was created long time ago. It was an unfinished story…and I will try to write all the things I remembered when I am making this short story..

Chapter One.

It was a nightmare that woke me up in the middle of the night. A nightmare I cannot remember but I felt that it was really bad one. I’ve been constantly having bad dreams nowadays. There were corpses, someone was chasing me but I cannot remember why I am being on the run. I cannot remember what I have done. It was my hobby to look for any meaning for my dreams that I can still remember. Searching the meaning of dreams from the internet may not be accurate however it gave me some thoughts. I decided to take a sip of coffee since I cannot go back from sleeping anymore. I blinked my eyes and stood up. I go downstairs and walked straight to the kitchen and put the coffee to brew. I was thinking that the night was too silent. It is my time then to think. I sat down on blue chair while sipping my brewed coffee. I noticed my own reflection on the black coffee. I still have the same face. The same old face. Who am I? Who really am i? those thoughts keep on rushing into my mind…I closed my eyes thinking those things and my thoughts lead me to a sound sleep.

I woke up from aching neck. I got stiff neck from sleeping on the chair. It was 7:00 am in the morning already and I felt really tired. Suddenly I noticed a scar on my left arm. When was it? when was the last time I got wound this much? I cannot remember when. Oh, I forgot the coffee. Did I finished it before I slept? I’m sure I did not. My heart pounded really fast. As i try to recall what I have done someone hugged me from behind. I was startled that I pushed the person as I escaped from those arms.

“Oh my!, It hurts! a lady in front of me was yelling hard.

“ohh, sorry sorrryyy, you startled me!..” I didn’t mean it. Are you hurt?”

“uhh…will I yell if I’m not!” sarcastically she said to me.

“I think it was your punishment for scaring me. ” I smiled at her.

She was stumping her feet like a child in front of me. She was just like that. A childish girl who loves to annoy me sometimes- no! all the time! She’s a typical girl. A friend whom I cherished for years.

“Samantha, how did you get in? I am sure I locked all the doors here?” I questioned her.

” Oh.. did you?.. i meeann did you really locked it? It was opened when I got here.” she innocently told me.

I slowly went toward her, while seductively caressing her hair down to her chin, I gave her a closer look.

“whhaatt are you doing…??? she asked nervously..

“I don’t believe you. Where’s my key?” I asked her while trying to kiss her. Ofcourse, It was just a prank. What I’ve forget was she’s no ordinary girl.

“Ouch!, Oh’myy…..” It really hurts so much that I have to fell down on the floor. She kicked me!

“I told you don’t ever do that again to me! Here!” She yelled at me and again hurt me again.

“Is there a need to throw the key to my face?” Grrr.r.. You are too annoying” I shouted her as she walked away.

“What ever!, By the way don’t be late! ,I’m leaving!

And that was my unfortunate fate. I can’t believe I have only one friend as brutal as her. Yes, only one. Not because I don’t want to be friends with other people but I do not have any choice. It was my fate and my story will keep to continue no matter what happens.

By the way, my name is …..

Yann.. Yann Walter.

***

“You will know a friend that is true when you feel the pain as he hits you with reality”